Look! Who’s Talking? Managing Points of View in Your Stories

Who’s talking? How many POV characters can we have? We have the woman on the phone, the older woman and the boy, plus the person on the other end of the phone line. Which one has most to lose? Who do we need to hear from?

Writers make choices all the time. One of the most important choices we make is who we choose to tell our stories. Selecting our ‘Point of View’ characters, or ‘Focalisers’ shapes the impact, focus and tone of our books. 

How do you choose which character will be your protagonist? Who will readers align with most? Whose actions and emotional epiphanies will lead the story and shape the plot? What other characters provide necessary juxtapositions to that viewpoint? What other insights can be gained from lesser characters and their perceptions of the protagonist?

William Faulkner’s As I Lay Dying was one of the first novels I read that demonstrated how effective multiple viewpoints of the same situation can be. In this short novel, Faulkner examines the death of a patriarch and the impact on his family, through showing us all of their perspectives. The same situation through different eyes. Anyone with siblings will understand how we can experience the same event as children, but each have different memories of it. Existence is subjective and by using multiple points of view characters we can express this subjectivity and draw out interesting points of difference. 

Another great novel to study the use of multiple viewpoints is Barbara Kingsolver’s The Poisonwood Bible, which uses the voices of a missionary’s wife and children in Africa, even a very young child. Each of those voices is powerful and intimate and gives us insight, not only into the events of the story, but also into each character, as we see not only how they view themselves but how they are viewed by others and how each is impacted by the situation.

Me and my brother Matty riding a horse 1975

In Thrill Seekers I used three, first person voices. Brian, the eldest brother tasked with protecting his brother and mother after the death of his father; Douggie, the younger brother who develops schizophrenia and Beck, a girl in the neighbourhood entangled in the mess the boys make. The use of first person brings the reader as close as possible to the reader. First person, present tense is the most immediate and intimate of voices. I chose Brian to be the protagonist and to begin and end the story because he had most at stake. He was the one given the ‘quest’ of protecting the family so his struggle to do so shapes the narrative. Douggie’s voice gives the perspective of the son who has lost his battle with grief and his mind in the process. Beck provides a feminine view of the events and the boys themselves.

My nana's sisters are the flower girls here, their mother seated on the far left

IDear Madman I again used three main strands. I like the balance three brings and often warn writers of the dangers of only using two focalisers. This results in a battle for supremacy, whereas three strands weave together easily, like a plait. The murderer Joe’s voice, came to me so strongly I had no choice but to take dictation of his flood of excuses, blame and hopelessness. His voice was so strong it was a fight to contain him and wrest back control of the book. I attempted to balance his first-person rant with a more subdued third person omniscient (this means going into multiple character’s viewpoints within the same section) strand of the family members, with each expressing the impact of this man’s presence and actions throughout. Still the book’s balance wasn’t there until I added the third strand, my own memoir voice, interpreting and reflecting on my research journey and the intergenerational effects of violent crime. 

HOW DO YOU CHOOSE YOUR POV CHARACTERS?

Who has the most to lose?
  1. Choose your protagonist – the character with a quest or question that must be answered. This character usually has the most to lose. Think about this throughout. What is at stake? What is the very worst that could happen to them? Make it worse.
  • Will you have an antagonist? Is there a human adversary to your main character? Getting inside their head will give an interesting depth and perspective. Why do these ‘bad’ guys do the bad things? What motivates them? (Every one of your characters has a goal, desires and dreams, even those without focaliser status)
  • Which other character’s perspective will bring the most nuance and insight to the story events? Find another character who loves, or hates, or is investigating one or both of the other focalisers. What will they bring to the story? 
Mother, daughter, child? What part does each voice play?

HOW MANY VOICES?

From experience I’d recommend three to five focalisers. More than this can become confusing for the reader, unless expertly managed. Beware of the two hander and that battle for supremacy – finding that balance is very tricky.

Cave ceiling without illumination

DIFFERENTIATING THE VOICES

A lot of commercial fiction these days separates different viewpoint third person POV sections in their own chapters. For example a story of three sisters around the death of their mother, which is told in chapters that alternate between the three perspectives. Even though they were brought up in the same family, culture and environment, each of these voices needs to be immediately recognisable. Their way of speaking, thinking and being in the world must show through in their chapters from the first line of each of their sections. A heading with their name at the top of the page isn’t enough.

Get to know your characters through daydreaming about them, collaging their worlds, doing lots of backstory writing about them, getting into their heads. Try my “Getting into Character” exercise for a great way to access their psychology. Differentiate each one with idiosyncratic ways of speaking and behaving. One may bulldoze over everyone else’s attempts to speak. Another may end every sentence with a question mark or start each one with “sorry”. Another may remain mostly silently but have the greatest insight into the hearts of the others and herself.

A change of perspective can bring new light to a situation and illuminate it! Same cave ceiling, different perspective!

Using multiple viewpoint characters is also very useful in shaping a suspenseful plot. One of the best pieces of advice I’ve received in my 24 years plus of writing, is “Don’t take the reader where they want to go.” End a scene on a cliffhanger – never solve a situation within a scene – then take the reader to the next POV character and flesh out their scene leading to another cliffhanger, then switch to the next POV and then finally back to our first character, resolve that dilemma and move onto the choice or cliffhanger and so on. 

In traditional memoir you are confined to the first person past tense voice of “I”, though even then we have “previous you” and “wise you now”. But you can also do as Kris Olsson did in Boy Lost and I did in Dear Madman, recreate scenes and characters from the past to provide other strands and viewpoints.

I hope that has demystified using multiple points of view a little. Any questions just ask!

If you’d like to immerse yourself in your writing and learn more about the craft from me and the wonderful Kerstin Pilz in person, we still have a few rooms left for our September 19 – 24 Byron Bay Writing Retreat. Writers of all levels of experience and genders are welcome. If you have an ABN for your writing, all retreats are tax deductible! YES!

Workshops on retreat are lots of fun!

Bookings are now open for Italy 2027 too (one large single and one shared room – grab a writing friend for the holiday of a lifetime!).

In the meantime, write like the wind – wild and free and don’t let the bastards get you down!

Lots of love,

Edwina 🙂 xx

HEAVEN ON A STICK – Incredible Italy Writing Retreat 2025 – Rundown

Incredible Italy Writing Retreat gang 2025
Incredible Italy Writing Retreat gang 2025 outside Terzo

Ever since Kerstin and I first saw photos of Terzo Di Danciano we felt drawn to hold a retreat there. The restored hilltop fortress looked like something out of a fairytale, filled with magic. Perfect for a writers’ retreat. But on our way, as we drove further and further into the remote forested hills of Tuscany bordering Umbria we wondered if perhaps we’d made the right decision. If it was too far from the crowds, if we’d be isolated, trapped like princesses in that tower.

Anna at her bedroom window - Incredible Italy Writing Retreat 2025

But as soon as we arrived and our delightful hosts, Krizsti and Luca, carried our bags up to our rooms and showed us around, we knew we’d found somewhere very special indeed. Every room is beautiful in its own way, some with Luca’s original artworks decorating the walls, some with restored frescoes, Anna’s door resplendent with angels. Sleek, modern, heated bathrooms, air-conditioning in every room, crisp ironed sheets and fresh flowers from the garden on the writing desks ticked every box. Magnificent views over the surrounding hills and valleys brought light and joy from every window. 

The yoga shala, in the converted barn, is every yogin’s dream. The floor in the shala has wide weathered wooden floorboards, polished and worn from use. Huge arched windows let in the sun and views and newly installed heating ensured we were toasty warm even on the coldest mornings.

Yoga shala - Incredible Italy Writing Retreat 2025

Downstairs from the fully equipped yoga room is the sublime spa. I thought I didn’t like saunas. I probably hadn’t had one for a couple of decades, but the twin saunas here – one steamy, the other infrared – made a huge difference to my enjoyment of the retreat. Usually, I’m working so hard I forget to relax and enjoy myself, but every afternoon I headed to the saunas and bubbling spa bath and emerged refreshed and renewed. I don’t know the science behind saunas, but it certainly felt like my whole nervous system was being soothed and rebooted. I’m hooked!

Eclipse Spa - Terzo Di Danciano
Eclipse Spa – Terzo Di Danciano – LOVED IT!

The main teaching rooms and dining hall cover the main floor of the converted barn, a huge pine fire roaring in the fireplace far into the night. Comfy lounges in cosy corners were perfect for chatting with other writers. We had tables to work at and Sergio and Anne-Claire and the team in the kitchen serving us delicious meals every few hours. But the breakfast room tops the lot. A recent addition to the centre, this stunning glass-walled suntrap makes the most of the stunning location and every morning we tramped down from yoga to find a sumptuous buffet of fruit, cereals, smoked salmon, cheeses and ham, breads and just about everything imaginable on your dream breakfast menu.

Most days when we woke, we looked out the windows to a sea of cloud below us, blanketing the valley as we princesses on the hill stretched and drank in the beauty as the sun came out and bathed us all in soft golden light. Yoga, breakfast, then a break before our daily workshops. With writers ranging from newbies to those with published books under their belts, we adjusted writing activities and content accordingly. Small feedback groups and genre buddies formed organically as writers met up in the afternoons to share work and run ideas by each other, if they weren’t writing up a storm on their own, that is. With only nine participants Kerstin and I had plenty of time to discuss projects with our guests, one on one, and I really enjoyed pulling tarot cards for everyone to help them grow, not only as writers but as people. I even pulled cards for our lovely hosts.

Highlights of the week include a fun excursion to Cortona, to St Francis’s hermitage, St Margarita’s spectacularly beautiful church and the long steep walk down the Roman roads into the ancient town, where some of us may have gone a bit art crazy and bought up big. Gelatos to top off the day, then home again. Lovely Bec had rented a car and led a smaller excursion to Assisi which was heartily enjoyed by those who went. Thank you Bec!

We had a ball at Sergio’s cooking class too, some more professional pasta makers than others, but all good eaters. However, when Sergio sang sad love songs on our live music night, he claimed a little of our hearts. The band was fantastic and before we knew it, we were all up dancing. What a ball we had! Patrizia showed us some fancy salsa moves, Anna swinging with her, the rest of us releasing our best disco moves (some unused for decades). Such fun! I’m just glad no footage survives of my shimmying. But boy, we had a good time.

This retreat was really something special. Even as facilitators, Kerstin and I emerged after our week of yoga, writing workshops, saunas, spas, massages and excursions feeling rested and replenished. I loved seeing people light up with epiphanies about their projects (and their lives), thousands of new words being written and new writing friendships developing. 

As always, we finished retreat with collages to shine light on our ways forward, working with images instead of words, planting seeds for the futures and books we’d like to create. 

With seven nights together, we really bonded as a group, and it was hard to say goodbye as everyone headed off on their own adventures (there were many!). For days after these retreats, people’s energies and writing projects stay with me. So from afar I send them bum glue, persistence, patience and creative epiphanies to bring their book dreams to life.

For a while Kerstin and I were so enamoured with Terzo Di Danciano we were determined to return in 2026 – until we regained our senses and realised we’re only human and need more time. 

So instead, we’ve booked back in to Terzo Di Danciano for the next Incredible Italy Writing Retreat for October 1- 8, 2027.  Details to be updated soon. If you’re super keen drop me a line and I’ll bags a spot for you before we even open for bookings!

That will give everyone enough time to save up, because let’s face it Europe is far and Euros expensive. BUT boy oh boy was it worth it? YES!! All the info HERE!

If you’ve always dreamed of your own Tuscan writing getaway, come and join us at this heavenly retreat centre in 2027. We’d love to share this magical place and all the inspiration and heart healing of retreat with you. Put yourself and your writing dreams into these pictures. I can’t wait to share it with you! More on the 2027 retreat HERE.

With special love to our wonderful retreaters who made this inaugural Italian retreat such a joy. Love you guys!

Lots of love

Edwina 🙂 xx