Having your book published is one of life’s greatest joys for writers. All those years of invisible toil and people thinking you’re crazy feel worth it when your book is finally launched into the world. Yes! It feels great.

PLEASURES

The first day I held Dear Madman in my hot little hands, I read through it quickly and saw only typos including that dreaded ‘George goat’. But the next day when I picked it up again, then put it back down, I realised the greatest reward of publication. I could put it down! Properly. The story was no longer something I carried with me wherever I went, heavy on my mind, always thinking about it, something I missed, something to add, where to publish. As I placed the book back on my bedside table, it stayed there and I went on to do other things. I went back, the book was still there, real and outside myself. Separate. An entity of its own, finding its own way in the world. The weight of its burden lifted.

Publishing a book is often likened to having a baby, except I’ve never carried a baby inside me for 16 years! A book is born like a foal, ready to stand on its own. Yes, I still need to help it find its way, make sure it is seen, plan events and send it out for review. But now the book belongs to everyone; their imagination and experiences melding with mine through the text. A new creation with every new reader. Real life magic.

Receiving responses from friends and even strangers who’ve read the book is a great post publication pleasure. I hope you feel this kind of recognition of your writing one day too. Thank you to those who’ve emailed me as soon as they’ve finished reading, filled with the story, faces still damp with tears. Thank you to those who also put up reviews on Goodreads, or told their friends, posted about it and shared. This support means the world to me and to all writers. If you’d like to help out and add a review, you can do so HERE.

Thank you to the wonderful and talented Cass Moriarty whose beautiful review made me see the book in a new way.

Books from small presses like AndAlso Books need this wonderful word of mouth to sell. Luckily, I’ve had over a decade’s experience in promoting and even distributing my own work. Thrill Seekers was published by a small UK press, so I had to push it uphill on my own. It went on to be shortlisted in the NSW literary awards. Although the book baby is born walking, it still needs the writer to make sure it’s visible. As I learnt with my Covid self-publishing experiment, A Guide Through Grief, no marketing equals no sales. No matter how well-intentioned and marketable the product. 

Other post-publication joys include getting reviews, as long as they’re good of course. I was thrilled to score a half page review in The Weekend Australian, sharing the spread with esteemed Queensland writer, the late, great David Malouf. Oh happy day! 

Another pleasure, for me, is doing related events at bookstores and libraries, even the Police Museum if you’re lucky like I was. Answering reader questions about your story, signing books and meeting enthusiastic readers is the best writing fun you can have when you’re not actually writing. Getting interview requests and being on podcasts and radio shows can also be fun. 

But beware, doing these events and interviews can feel very exposing. A lot of the above-mentioned pleasures have a peril side as well. 

PERILS

Yes, it’s great getting good reviews, but our brains seem to seek out even small negatives inside much greater positives and focus on those. Yes it was great getting the review in The Australian but the reviewer said there was too much “woo-woo”. I have 29, five-star reviews on Goodreads (thank you everyone!) and one four-star. Which one do I lie awake worrying about? Yup! 

The general rule is NOT to read reviews, but the good ones do feel good. If you’re extra sensitive – and let’s face it most writers are – then get a friend to take a look first and only show you the positive reviews. I love Gay’s idea of printing out every single good review and piece of positive feedback about her memoir Will I Ever Be Who I Am and sticking them on her wall. She’s up to ten full pages. 

We don’t all have personal assistants to make sure we’re well taken care of. Be your own best friend and schedule breaks.

Other perils include burning out doing events. When you’re on the circuit, doing event after event, especially when it is a deeply personal work, as Dear Madman is, including a memoir strand, then it can all feel horribly exposing. Event after event talking about yourself and the book is exhausting. I’ve learnt to pace myself and leave gaps between gigs, but still, after a while you get sick of the sound of your own voice and wish someone else could do it for you. Taking really good care of yourself, doing your self-care rituals and practices daily is vital during this period of publicity. And if it’s all too much, pull the plug on an event or two. A few disappointed punters are far outweighed by your own wellbeing. 

Publishing any book feels like running around town in your undies, but publishing memoir is like running around town stark naked, or after a bad interview it can leave you feeling skinless. Muscles and nerves exposed to harsh light and judgements. Memoirists take note.

Keep loved ones close to keep you grounded. This is an old photo from 1994/5 of me with my beloved Nana (Nana Franny in Dear Madman), and beautiful sisters and Mum.

An interview I did a few weeks ago really shook me. An older fellow, ex-sportsman who usually interviews sports stars and musicians, suddenly had “woo-woo” me to interrogate. Questions he would never ask a man started our discussion. “Are you single?”, “Why did your marriage break up?”. Then he kept going for the sore points in search of ratings. When asked about resonances in my own life with the murderer’s story, I told him about my own father’s death, my brother’s mental illness, but he pushed on. “Wasn’t there a dead baby?”

Shocked by his audacity, I answered and continued the interview, but afterwards I felt sickened. Raw and vulnerable. Yes, it’s in the book, but mate, some things aren’t open for discussion with strangers.

Memoirs open you up to this kind of unwanted, intrusive and ugly line of questioning. Your life comes under examination. Not the work. Not the story. YOU. It’s not supposed to be like that, but it is. I comforted myself with the thought that all publicity is good publicity, but I now have some strict boundaries around what I will and won’t talk about publicly. I resisted including a memoir strand in Dear Madman for many years because of this kind of thing. Memoirists, be ready with boundaries around what you are happy to discuss and areas that are off limits.

Put up some boundaries around what you’re happy to discuss.

Pleasures far outweigh the perils in the long run. Learn how to manage the perils and stay sane through the publicity and exposure, how to print out those good reviews and bin the rest. Stick up for yourself and your right to privacy. Protect your sensitive self in interviews and make space for downtime between events.

Relish the joy of knowing your work is out there in the world finding its own way. Cherish the empty spaces available in your mind, now this huge burden of work has been released. Let yourself celebrate. This is a writer’s harvest time, so feast, frolic and be merry!

Writing buddies understand. With the delightful Nicky Peelgrane, Amanda O’Callaghan, Fiona Robertson and her lovely sister Julene. Keep your writing gang close.

Wishing you all the pleasures of publication and plenty of strength and courage to handle the perils.

Lots of love,

Edwina 🙂 xx

PS. Are you ready to tackle the next draft of your work in progress? Writing mojo need a reboot? Come along on retreat. Places still left for Springbrook in August and Byron Bay in September. A few rooms still available for Italy 2027 too 🙂 ALL THE INFO HERE