The horse that threw me

The horse that threw me


I’ve been writing a long time now. In 2002 when my children were small, I first dedicated time each day to a creative writing practice and used to spend naptime typing in a fury to complete a novel.

Since then my beautiful babies have grown into young adults and I’ve written another five full length manuscripts, one of which has been published.

Not for want of trying.

Much as I try to convince myself that rejections hurt less over time, it’s a lie and I know it.

The elephant hide I’ve tried so hard to develop has worn as thin as an old cotton sheet in places, tearing at the slightest tug. I’ve tried to chuck it all in, get a normal job like other people. But that hasn’t exactly gone to plan either.

I want to write. I still want to write. It’s how I make sense of the world. How my brain works best, what I enjoy most, get most satisfaction from, what I’m best at.

And so today, I’m dragging out the last half-baked rewrite of “Dear Madman” and seeing what I can salvage. If I can figure out how to give it the voice and form it longs for.

I’m scared of that horse, it’s big and fiery-eyed and stomping its hoofs. But I’m getting back on, goddamn it! I’m going to cling to its mane as it bucks and twists; it won’t throw me again. I’m going to ride it, as fast as I can, as far as I can, wind in my hair

Chocolate Cinnamon Self-Saucing Pudding for rejection days

Here’s something sweet and warm and gooey to cheer you up on those days when rejection letters and emails fill your inbox and this writing game seems just too hard.

Make the pudding while repeating to yourself.

I am a good writer. My work is valuable. My success is inevitable!

This will make the pudding taste extra good.

Eat it, then go write something just for fun.
Love to all,



I cup self-raising flour
3/4 cup dark brown sugar (any sugar will do but I like the dark)
2 tablespoons cocoa
1/2 cup milk
One or two tablespoon cinnamon (or 1 teaspoon vanilla or both!)
50 gms melted butter

I cup dark brown sugar
1/4 cup cocoa
1 3/4 cup boiling water


Preheat over to 180 degrees. Grease dish.
Mix flour, sugar, cocoa, milk, cinnamon and butter together. Pour into dish. (This mixture is quite thick, don’t worry!)
Mix brown sugar and cocoa together and sift on top of mix.
Carefully pour hot water over top.
Bake approximately 30 minutes till cake part is cooked.
Eat with ice-cream! (Very important)